Preface

 
Preface
 
 
Greetings, 

 

As I have said in other introductions, all these thoughts began coming to mind in 1989 towards the end of my teaching years in Ojai. After moving up to Chico in Northern California, I began transcribing all the notebooks that were piling up. Since money and being on stage have never been all that motivating, I was not sure what to do with it all, if anything. As the gold rush of the early internet and email began to roll, I got the idea in the mid-90’s to send it out randomly – spam before the word spam became prevalent, at least in my mind – and began haphazardly collecting email addresses from all the uncloaked emails being forwarded during the web's early daze. My bad-boy sniping across the digital void evoked a variety of responses, not all of them happy or pleasant. It was not a lengthy escapade, and eventually, while on disability and attending Humboldt State a few years later, I took an HTML programming class, created the website, and have used it as center stage ever since.

 

As to the wide range of responses, Lao Tzu said it well in Chapter 41 of the Tao Te Ching translated by Derek Lin:

 

Higher people hear of the Tao

They diligently practice it

Average people hear of the Tao

They sometimes keep it and sometimes lose it

Lower people hear of the Tao

They laugh loudly at it

If they do not laugh, it would not be the Tao

 

Tao Te Ching Online Translation

https://taoism.net/tao-te-ching-online-translation/

 

In his collection of ancient writings titled The Perennial Way, Bart Marshall translated it:

 

When the wise student hears of Tao,

he practices diligently.

When the average student hears of Tao,

he practices off and on.

When the foolish student hears of Tao,

he laughs out loud.

If the foolish do not laugh, it is not Tao.

 

Tao Te Ching: Forty-One

https://theperennialway-taoteching.blogspot.com/2011/06/forty-one.html

 

So, for good, for ill, or for nada, it is out there in the winds of space and time, toying with human consciousness, toying with the mystery, as seen through this natured-nurtured frame of reference.

 

A PDF is available at:

 

Spam Responses (a.k.a., WTF Is This Shit!?)

http://www.thestillnessbeforetime.com/spamresponsesakawtfisthisshit.pdf

 

Writing has been an enjoyable process ever since I first began toying with prose; scribbling poetry, keeping journals, corresponding with friends and acquaintances during the college daze. The philosophical/mystical/whatever-you-want-to-call-them thoughts, that have been popping into mind since 1989, have always been very out-of-the-blue spontaneous. Nothing planned or forced about them. They are being shared on the off chance that others may find them of interest, though, quite frankly, it really does not matter if no one else ever even reads them, for I am, first and foremost, my own audience. I got mine, so to speak. I played my little part. I had my share of fun. And it is, as it has ever been, up to each to discern their own, on their own. There are really no followers in this Don Quixote quest; only earnest seekers, who waylay their desires and fears and dreads, enough to discern that which is the end to doubt, the end to dueling with windmills. “Yay” if it is your fate to figure it out. “Oh well” if it is not. And “so it goes” either way, really. Ecclesiastes 1:2 is always a good reminder: “Vanity of vanities,” saith the Preacher, “Vanity of vanities. All is vanity.” Awareness can only, with great effort, regain control, regain sovereignty, from the usurper, imagination, creator of all that is time, creator of all that is space. Creator of all that is illusion, has never been anything more than illusion, will never be anything more than illusion. Only as real as the given moment.

 

“The Stillness Before Time” is the original work that came together in 1992, including mostly aphorisms, an essay, a newspaper question-and-answer, ten reflections, and lists of both movies and books. Though an early self-published version, long since edited and expanded, can be purchased at major booksellers, a downloadable copy is available, no charge, at the link below. There are also links to a variety of blogs of other creations by me, along with links to many writings of a similar nature, by thinkers and seers from across all times, across all geographies.

 

"The Ponderings of Yaj Ekim" is the second published book, and is both blogged and available as a PDF download.

 

The “Breadcrumbs” titles, published annually since 2015, all include the core chapters: Leftovers, Soundbites, Breadcrumbs. In the Breadcrumbs chapters, I unleash thoughts of a more personal nature than in the other two. All just to show I was ensconced in a living, breathing, relativity mundane, oftentimes foolish, mortal mind-body. An actor playing the hand that was dealt; same as everyone else, vain as everyone else. No need to sculpt me into more than I was. No need for myths, nor legends, nor fables, nor miracles, nor cult followings, nor any other fictions, any other absurdities, over to which the human mind, and all its imaginary history, has so often given itself. The Breadcrumbs chapters prove me again and again to be yet another Shakespearian player, as full of the limited and arbitrary as anyone else born into this dream of space and time. So please be sure not to shape me, or these many random thoughts, into some dogmatic absurdity. Use them as a launchpad, not an orbit.

 

“The Return to Wonder” blog is a compendium of aphorisms not included in the three other works: The Stillness Before Time, The Ponderings of Yaj Ekim, and Breadcrumbs. It originally totaled 3,000 pages formatted in 300 ten-page chapters written since 1990-ish. A gradual editing that will likely never be completed, is changing that dynamic into something of a mishmash.

 

Please note that this sort of wordplay is very haphazard, way too much work to put into any order. Probably best read it in bits and pieces in the here and there. One of those open-to-any-page works. Especially well-suited for coffee shops, coffee tables, and porcelain thrones.

 

Also note that all writings are always subject to updates and editing, so if you are interested in the most current version – before this house of cards comes tumbling down, and the world grows large again – downloading PDF copies every once and a while might be a reasonable discipline. This applies especially to the current year of Breadcrumbs, which could well be an annual project until the last wheezing breath, though frankly, the temptation to stop writing entirely is not off the table. It is a pleasant way to pass some of the countdown remaining, but it is unlikely there is much ground that has not been wandered by this frame of reference far more than enough already. No matter how many times Sisyphus rolls the boulder up the mountain, it is more than a little doubtful that the blind men and their true-believer followers, will ever discern, ever realize, ever embrace, the elephant in the middle of the room, without fabricating some new form of absurdity. It is the way we roll, it is the way we have always rolled, it is the way we will, far more than probably, always roll. Every species has its limitations, and we have in this mind’s eye, far-exceeded ours.

 

That said, if you do find these many thoughts at all worth preserving, for whatever times are ahead for this world and all its life forms, please feel free to share them with others who might also appreciate them. Else they may well swiftly slip back into the timeless oblivion from whence they came.

 

So it goes, either way. I played my part, I said my piece, I had my fun.

 

All the best,

 

M

 

 

P.S. For best viewing online, using the largest screen you have available to explore my little theme park, is suggested. Scrolling down and down on a phone screen is just not going to give you the same entrée.

 

P.P.S. Regarding the name Yaj Ekim ... It is just a reverse spelling of the first and middle names ... Michael Jay Holshouser ... Mike Jay ... Yaj Ekim.

 

P.P.P.S. Coincidently, make of it whatever you will, or will not, Yaj is an Indian boy’s name meaning worshipper, sacrifice, another name for Shiva, a sage. And Ekim is a Turkish name for October meaning “sowing” (of seeds). All kinds of absurdity can be read into that by the many, so-inclined – none of which was in mind when the idea came to reverse the letters to my name. See P.P.S. for details.

 

P.P.P.P.S. Yes, I am Shiva. And so are You. No, I am not Shiva. And neither are you. Irony and paradox rule.

 

 

 

The Stillness Before Time

Reflections From a Fellow Sojourner
 
 

Website
 
The Stillness Before Time
Reflections From a Fellow Sojourner
https://thestillnessbeforetime.com/

 

There is really only one Way.

It is without division or boundary.

It is without name or theology.

Awareness is its scripture.

Here now, its venue.

You, its witness.

Your life, the journey.

 
A PDF is available at:
https://thestillnessbeforetime.com/thestillnessbeforetime.pdf

 

 

One Through Thirty
 
One * 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17

18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 * Thirty

 
 
Essays
 
Of the Human Journey
 
Got God?
 
Ten Reflections
 
 
Blog and PDF
 
Blog * PDF
 
 
Other Resources
 
Books * Movies * Links * Blogs
 
 
Main Blogs & PDF's
 
(All blogs and PDF's subject to change, so stay tuned)
 
The Stillness Before Time
Reflections From a Fellow Sojourner
Blog * PDF
 
The Ponderings of Yaj Ekim
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2015
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2018
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2019
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2020
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2021
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2022
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
Breadcrumbs 2023 & Beyond
Bits and Pieces From a Dream of Time
Blog * PDF
 
The Return to Wonder
Field Notes From the Unknown
(Major edit underway -- Edited copy colored blue)
Blog * PDF
 
 
Blogs & PDF's of Other Works
 
Michael's Rabbit Hole
A Selection of Breadcrumbs & Other Aphorisms
Blog * PDF
 
The Call of the Eternal
A Conversation With My Self
Blog * PDF
 
Imagination: The Great Usurper
Blog * PDF
 
Lost in Translation
The Human Paradigm's Linguistic Muddle
Blog * PDF
 
The Gordian Knot of Ethical Thinking
Blog * PDF
 
Jesus on Prophets
What Any Seer Likely Faces Returning to the Cave of Origin
Blog * PDF
 
Aftershocks Autumn 2024
Blog * PDF
 
Of Meaning and Purpose
Ponderings About the Futility of It All
Blog * PDF

 

Frames of Reference
Peering Through the Windows of Perception
Blog * PDF

 

Mystery, Mystery & More Mystery
Blog * PDF
 
Imagination, Imagination & More Imagination
Blog * PDF
 
Doubt, Doubt & More Doubt
Blog * PDF
 
Science, Science & More Science
Blog * PDF
 
History, History & More History
Blog * PDF
 
Patterns, Patterns & More Patterns
Blog * PDF
 
Reincarnation, Reincarnation & More Reincarnation
Blog * PDF
 
Standouts From the Return to Wonder Edit
Selections From the First Sixteen Chapters
Blog * PDF
 
Of the Human Journey
Along with Got God? And Ten Reflections
Blog * PDF
 
To Be or Not to Be
Blog * PDF
 
The Mystery of the Mystery
Blog * PDF
 
Who Was the First?
Blog * PDF
 
The Real is Discovering
Blog * PDF
 
59 Moments to The Way It Is (And Is Not)
The Scribe's Guide to the Great Whatthe#$*!?
Blog * PDF
 
Definitions
An Incomplete Selection 0f Contemplative Definitions
Blog * PDF
 
Conversations
A Variety of Letters, Emails, Texts, & Sundry Odd 'n Ends
Blog * PDF
 
Titles, Titles & More Titles
Blog * PDF
 
Even More

Titles, Titles & More Titles
Blog * PDF
 
Sketches of the Once Upon a Time
A Few Epiphanies and Other Hallmark Moments
Blog * PDF
 
The Corollaries of Yaj Ekim
Blog * PDF
 
Possible Last Words & Epitaphs
Blog * PDF
 
The Standard Ripostes
The Scribe's Go-to Responses to This and That in the Day-To-Day
Blog * PDF
 
My (Not Quite) Haiku
Blog * PDF
 
Jester Amok
Blog * Facebook * Facebook (Original)
 
Uncle Sam Says
Blog * Facebook
 
Once Upon a Christmas
Blog * PDF
 
Ditties for the Bluegrass Pyre
Blog * PDF
 
A Short List of Books for the Up and Coming
Some Written Works That May Help Get the Young up to Speed
Blog * PDF
 
Spam Responses (a.k.a., WTF Is This Shit!?)
Blog * PDF
 
 
A Collection of Miscellaneous Creations
 
Final Exit and Related Links
 
COVID-19 Information Links
 
The Blind Men and the Elephant
 
Of A Philosophical Nature
 
The Four Agreements
 
The Joyful Curmudgeon
 
12 Rules You Can Live By
 
Quotes, Quotes & More Quotes
 
Fichier Circulaire de Michael
 
How to Work in Any Environment
 
50 Rules Kids Won't Learn in School
 
Election 2016: The Rise (and Fall?) of Donald Trump
 
Michael's Little Warehouse of All Things Amusing, Absurd & Profound
 
 
Other Blogs and PDF's by Michael
 
Other Blogs and PDF's by Michael
 
 
Facebook
 
Michael Holshouser
 
Fichier Circulaire de Michael
(Michael's Circular File)

 
Yaj Ekim
 
 
Twitter/X
 
@YajEkim
 
 
Instagram
 
Michael Holshouser

 

 

Nine Translations of the Ashtavakra Gita
 
The Heart of Awareness (Byrom)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Marshall)
 
Bitten by the Black Snake (Schoch)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Richards)
 
A Duet of One (Balsekar)
 
Astavakra Samhita (Wood)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Shastri)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Saraswati)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Vedic Scriptures)
 
 
PDF's of Nine Translations of the Ashtavakra Gita
 
The Heart of Awareness (Byrom)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Marshall)
 
Bitten by the Black Snake (Schoch)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Richards)
 
A Duet of One (Balsekar)
 
Astavakra Samhita (Wood)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Shastri)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Saraswati)
 
Ashtavakra Gita (Vedic Scriptures)
 
 
Ashtavakra Gita: I Am Shiva
 
Ashtavakra Gita: I Am Shiva
 
 
PDF's of Ashtavakra Gita: I Am Shiva
 
Ashtavakra Gita: I Am Shiva
 
I Am Shiva Comparison Chart
 
 
Four Translations of the Avadhuta Gita
 
Avadhuta Gita: Song of the Ever-Free (Marshall)
 
Song of the Avadhut (Abhayananda)
 
Avadhut Gita (Shastri)
 
Avadhuta Gita: The Song of the Ascetic (Sinha)
 
 
PDF's of Four Translations of the Avadhuta Gita
 
Avadhuta Gita: Song of the Ever-Free (Marshall)
 
Song of the Avadhut (Abhayananda)
 
Avadhut Gita (Shastri)
 
Avadhuta Gita: The Song of the Ascetic (Sinha)
 
 
Translations of Other Ancient Writings
 
Tao Te Ching: Verse One
 
Tao Te Ching (Marshall)
 
Bhagavad Gita (Marshall)
 
Yoga Sutras (Marshall)
 
Dhammapada (Marshall)
 
Ecclesiastes (Marshall)
 
Atma Bodha (Chinmayananda)
 
The Essence of the Ribhu Gitaj (Aiyer)
 
Yoga Vasishta Sara (Ramasramam)
 
Crest-Jewel of Discrimination (Madhavananda)
 
Mandukya Upanishad & Mandukya Karika of Gaudapada (Panoli)
 
Gaudapada: Advaita Vedanta's First Philosopher (Jones)
 
 
Translations of Ancient Writings by Bart Marshall
 
Avadhuta Gita: Song of the Ever-Free
 
Ashtavakra Gita
 
Tao Te Ching
 
Bhagavad Gita
 
Yoga Sutras
 
Dhammapada
 
Ecclesiastes
 
 
Writings by Bart Marshall
 
Verses Regarding True Nature
 
One Hundred Two Haiku
 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

Spam Responses (a.k.a., WTF Is This Shit!?)

© Michael J. Holshouser 2016

World Rights Reserved

 

Michael J. Holshouser

1112 Cedar Creek Drive, Unit 4

Modesto, California 95355-5213

The United States of America

mjholshouser@gmail.com

 

Pronunciation: Holtzhowzer

 

All have the express written encouragement

To distribute this creation freely to any and all

Who have the eyes to see and the ears to hear

The mystery in which each and every one

Equally participates in so many ways

Spam Responses (a.k.a., WTF Is This Shit!?)


Spam Responses (a.k.a., WTF Is This Shit!?)


I have been receiving your email for a while now. I am wondering if we have met?


Richard Miller


* * * *


If you're up to it, send me the entire file so far of all the chapters and I'll let others see it as well.


joy ...


Richard Miller


* * * *


Response:


Richard,


What I've been doing is sending these chapters one at a time so that people might actually take a few moments to read the whole thing. Too much at once, with all of us wrapped up in so much busy-ness, might be overwhelming and just get filed away or deleted. As it is, many just ask to be removed from the random email list I came up with, often with an exclamation point or so.


But if you have a way of setting up the whole thing on your website, or can give me hints on how to set one up for free, I’m interested. At this writing, I’m not that into the internet, nor am I in the financial position to afford it.


Meanwhile, feel free to forward what you have to people that you know are interested in this sort of thing. More will come, about thirty chapters plus a few essays. The reason they are arriving so slowly is because I don't have internet access at home and use the computers at the local university as I get over there.


Because some people have asked for actual copies, I'm thinking about offering Kinko's-made, spiral-bound versions for about $15 in the near future. Several publishing companies I contacted a few years ago liked the work, but said it wouldn’t make them any money. I wanted to tell them it isn't about money, but oh well. So, I decided to give it away free on the web, but if some people want to pay, so be it.


Let me know what you think.


Michael


P.S. What I'm sending out is only the tip of the iceberg. All total, I've transcribed almost 1300 pages of this aphoristic silliness, and still have another 20-30 notebooks, plus the daily percolations. A lot of it is, I suppose, pretty repetitious, but we're all here doing one thing or another, and this, ridiculous as it sometimes seems to be, is what comes through me. C'est la vie.


* * * *


thanks for responding to my email. Have you posted your words on any sites. I have a web address (http://members.aol.com/milleryoga/) and might enjoy linking to your poetry. I teach throughout the US, Canada and in Europe (non- dualism utilizing the tradition of yoga) and enjoy letting people know of various expressions of the Infinite.


joy ... richard Miller


* * * *


You might send some of the poetry to Inner Directions Magazine that published

non-dual literature.


mail@InnerDirections.org


www.InnerDirections.org                                


Matthew Greenblatt is the publisher.


I have my website on aol for free. I don't know whether hotmail has its own

sites that you can build into for free.


I will let people know of your poetry.


joy, Richard Miller


* * * *


Would you mind resending chapter 15, 16, 17, 18?


I was away in Italy and missed these emails. They expired by the time I got

to download them.


Thanks, Richard Miller


* * * *


Hey, that was neat. Thanks for the thoughts.


Love,


Ann Holshouser


* * * *


Dear Mike,


Thank you for sharing that with me. You have put into words what I so often feel. If I remember correctly, you are an excellent photographer – and now I see you are also an excellent writer. I would be interested in seeing the complete work. Is it available from your publisher?


I trust you are happy and well.


Christine Beard


* * * *


Hey, Cousin Michael,


You're getting pretty good at all this zen-style writing.


Thanks for the enlightening moments.


P.S. I erased, erronenously, several e-mails you sent me previously ... I didn't know who they were from and just deleted them out of habit. But since they kept coming, I checked the two you just sent me and was surprised. So, I'm sorry, but the others are gone. Perhaps, if you have them somewhere, like in "Mail you've sent" like AOL has, you could resend them. Mia culpa.


See you hopefully one day again,


Deborah Hunt


* * * *


Your essay takes the form of traditional sermons that paint a gloomy  picture of humanity and then call for the renewed commitment to the creed. We need more than that. We need tools that make this transformation possible. And then these tools are best offered freely, without a need to bring people to their knees.


David Merritt

Editorial Associate

Magical Blend Magazine


* * * *


Who are you?  (Jack Rawlins)


* * * *


Dear Friend:


This is an immediate auto-response thanking you for taking the time to contact Senator Boxer via email. Be assured that your message will be reviewed and that we will make every attempt to respond to your concerns, requests and or opinions in a timely fashion. Thank you.


* * * *


Thanks.


Mary Flynn


* * * *


Hi Michael,


Very interesting short story. Also very deep. Leaves room for much thought.


Please check out my web site at: northvalleyroads.com/mac


Thank you


Scott MacKenzie


* * * *


I don't know how you got our e-mail address , but please don't send us any more as we only use this to contact people who I have given the address to you are not one of these people, it will be a waste of your resourses to send anymore as I will deleat it before I even read it. 


Thank-you


Bruce Lewis


* * * *


Hi Michael ...


just got the passages from your "book."  Do you call it your book?  Thanks very much for sending them my way. I liked what I read ... but I  must say I will have to go back to read over some of the passages more  slowly ... I got the gist of what you're saying overall though, and I  as I said, I like it. When do you write all this stuff? When do you  think it?  I guess that's really an unnecessary question ... We think that all the time; every day ... the mind never really stops, does it.


A lot of what I read, reminded me of some of my Zen reading ... It also  reminded me of a book I've read (and reread) ... "Das Energi" by Paul  Williams. Have you read it? ... or heard of it? I think you'd like it. 


My experience with Zen comes primarily from Charlotte Joko Beck ... the  book you saw at Kinko's ... "Everyday Zen" ... and another that she also wrote, "Nothing Special."  They are both very good.


Oh yeah, the other book I thought of while I read your passages, is "The Celestine Prophecy."  I can see alot of parallels in your writing to the philosophies contained in that book.


Some of what you write seems to be a little doomsday ... some of it seems to "look on the bright side of life."


I'll have to read over it again ... I will definitely hold onto it, and perhaps pass it on to some folks.


A question ... Do you really think "Godness" is beyond the rational mind?  I mean, I think I have a pretty rational mind, and I don't feel like it's beyond me. 


Thanks for sending your writing to me. This life is so incredible ... or maybe the fact that we can think so  damn much about it, is what is really incredible. I do love it.


Madeline Medeiros


* * * *


Michael,


PLEASE REMOVE visible@maui.net   FROM YOUR MAILING LIST IMMEDIATELY


THIS IS A PROBLEM FOR ME. I GAVE YOU THIS ADDRESS AND THE PERSON DOES NOT WANT ANY MORE OF YOUE E-MAIL.


THANKS,


JOHN

omsatnam@hotmail.com


* * * *


STOP SENDING ME THIS BORING PEDANTIC BULLSHIT … ALL OF THESE THINGS HAVE BEEN SAID MUCH BETTER BY PEOPLE FAR BETTER INFORMED, MORE ARTICULATE, AND ACTUALLY POSSESSING THE CREDENTIALS TO SAY THEM. I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU GOT MY ADDRESS, PROBABLY FROM "PSYCHO-BOY" JANN OM SAT NAM. BUT YOU ARE ANNOYING ME. IF YOU CONTINUE I AM GOING TO START SENDING YOU YOUR OWN CORRESPONDENCES BACK SEVERAL HUNDREDS OF TIMES. YOU DON'T WANT THAT- OR WORSE, CERTAIN OTHER AMUSING LITTLE THINGS I KNOW HOW TO DO. CEASE AND DESIST. CONFINE YOUR MISSIVES TO THE RESIDENTS OF SEDONA, SANTA CRUZ, AND THE OTHER AIRHEAD CAPITALS OF THE WORLD. SOME OF US HAVE MINDS OF OUR OWN.


ALOHA,


LES VISIBLE


* * * *

Response:


Jaan,


Here's what your good buddy sent me. Seems to be a very disturbed, self-absorbed fellow in my view of things. A simple "please stop" would have been enough. But we'll just leave "Mr Postal" alone. Frankly, I wasn't too impressed with his stuff, either.


What I was surprised to find out was that there are credentials for this sort of thing. Would ask him where, but don't really feel the need to frame another piece of paper.


Hope you're having fun. Take care.


Michael


* * * *


Please refrain from sending further unsolicited e-mail to this address.


Brandon Fesler


* * * *


PLEASE STOP SENDING ME THIS FUCKING SHIT, I DON'T FUCKING CARE!!!!


Lucas M. Wilson


* * * *


I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT, PLEASE TAKE ME OFF OF YOUR LIST!!


Lucas M. Wilson


* * * *


Thanks for your essay, but it is not the kind of piece that we use. Please drop U.S. News from your e-mail list. 


Doug Stanglin


* * * *


please remove me from this list.


Bill Fishkin


* * * *


please remove me from this list. Thanks.


Chuck Worth


* * * *


Michael,


Please take us off your mailing list.


Joe Martin


* * * *


Thanks for thinking of me, but please remove me from the list.


Ray Bransky


* * * *


please take me off this list. thanks


Joan Hamilton


* * * *


Please don't send – give thanks


Kaera Anzalone


* * * *


eat me


Nicole Seredszun


* * * *


Hello.


We appreciate your e-mail, however, because our group is distinctly involved in stopping child pornography on the internet, we must ask that you refrain from using this e-mail address to forward your variety of insights into life. Our group recieves quite a lot of e-mail, and yours, unfortunetly, is being deleted, because it is not within the relm designed for this address (ehap@hackers.com). In the future, please take this e-mail address from your list. We appreciate the thought, but this address is really only intended as a means of forwarding information to us involved in child-pornography. If you have any futher comments/questions, please refrain from using the ehap@hackers.com address in the future.


Thank you.


RSnake


* * * *


I'm not really sure who you are or how we might have met. Can you clue  me in on that?


Also, I really am swamped with school and work, and so don't have time  for critique right now. I think maybe you would be better served by  sending your work to someone else.


Thanks,


Eirik Ott


* * * *


Remove me from your mailing list!


Alex Mak


* * * *


Unless you plan on tellin gme who you are and how you got my e-mail  address, I'd appreciate it if you STOPPED sending me e-mail.


Thanks,


Eirik Ott


* * * *


Please remove me from your email mailing list.


Thanks,


Nancy Praizler


* * * *


Mike:


I've been enjoying "the stillness"


Talk with you the next time.


Gene


* * * *


please take me off your e-mail list


Tom Gascoyne


* * * *


Please take us off your email list.


Keith Hollenbeck


* * * *


Dear Michael,


I'm enjoying "The Stillness Before Time" very much. Thank you for sending it for review. In my line of work I have a lot of time for reflection, especially while airborne on a 4 hour leg. The world looks mighty small from 7 miles up! Again, appreciate your sharing with me.


Sincerely,


Patrick Fitzgerald


* * * *


Dear Mr. Holtzhouzer,


Thank you for sending me your essay/dissertation.


I find no argument with it, just an acceptable viewpoint which I am happy to forward to a number of people.


As a Chritian, Anglican-flavored, theologian, I STILL have no quarrel with it --

but then, I've been accused of being liberal.


Good fruits, it seems to me, are the important thing.


I even had to give up being an anti-bigot, bigot, because I judged people who

Were judging people. However, I find fundamentalist Evangelicals and their anal-retentive God, so off-putting, I try to avoid their company if at all possible

(I have a son who's a right-wing, knee-jerk, reactionary, born-again Southern

Baptist who is legalistic 'til hell won't have it).


Let us break their bonds asunder ...


Warm regards,


Nancy Eckert


* * * *

I forgot to tell you I'm very fond of James Hillman. If you're interested, you may want to take a look at Blue Fire.


Nancy Eckert


* * * *


Thanks for the latest pieces ... so, do we ever get to meet for coffee so  we can talk about this?  I feel like I have all these unprocessed  reactions that I'd like to share with you ... let me know.


Blessings to you.


Mary Flynn


* * * *


Michael,


This is really excellent and thought provoking!  I really enjoyed it and would love to see it in one of those little books that people carry in their purse to remind them of where they have been whether in physical reality, or in mind. It seems that we forget on our journey what is and what seems to be, therefore slurring our realities. This would serve to remind us when we most needed to remember, because we would be drawn to discover it over and over again upon instinct. Everything has a purpose, even if we do not see it or admitt to it, but eventually we come to know it even if we do not realize it.


Eva Questo


* * * *


Hi Michael,


I'm enjoying the chapters ... every now and then run across something that strikes a particular chord.


thanks again for sharing.


Madeline Medeiros


* * * *


Shannon,


I am going through my last 4 months E-mail and just read this from you. Sorry I haven't been keeping up. I know the semester is  almost over but your welcome to E-mail and I'll check back in a day or  two. Hope everything worked out and thank you so much for all the E-mail!!!!!!


That stuff from Michael Holshouser is absolutely beautiful, were do you get all this stuff from?  Take care hope your feeling better soon.


Lynn Marie Ott


* * * *

Dear Michael,


I wanted to write and tell you how much I appreciate your E-Mails regarding "The Stillness Before Time."  I have enjoyed them a great deal. I just read the for the first time today because I have not read my E-mail since January.


Thank you again,


Lynn Ott


* * * *


'nuff said.


Eirik Ott


* * * *


Hello:


I don't know who you are and I do not accept emails from people I don't know. Please remove me from your mailing list.


Thanks.


Lynn M. Wilson


* * * *


Thanks very much for the poem. best,


Leah Garchik


* * * *


Dear Michael,


I don't know where you got my email address but I'm glad you sent this to me. I loved it. Where is chapter one?


Lynne Thomas


* * * *


Dear Michael:


Thanks for the latest installments!


John King


* * * *


Hi Michael:


I didn't know who you were. We only get 25 hours a month for email and run out early every month, so we only use email for business and just have to delete everything else so didn't even look at what you sent. Sorry about that. Hope all is well.


Lynn M. Wilson


* * * *


PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM YOUR MAILING LIST!


Barbara Evans


* * * *


This one I like. Short and to the point. "No system is required to discover and own your birthright." Very true. I used to live in Westhaven, near Trinidad. I would spend many hours perched on a cliff above the rolling sea drifting with the wind and clouds. Introspection ruled. The peace I encountered there stays with me still, no matter where I go. There was no particular brand of faith, or sacred chant , or ordained direction involved in my self-awarenes, just a willingness to look and think and feel and be. Inner peace is obtainable. Self-awareness is obtainable. And no system is required ... 


Pat Fitzgerald


* * * *

remove us from your list


The Synthesis


* * * *


hi mike,


thank you for sending me your stuff, but i rarely get around to reading it and do not see a way in which i can help you get published. I have my own zine and we do print fiction. i would strongly suggets printing your own zine adding some pictures and circulating it at coffee shops. so, so what you will, but if you could get me off your list that would be greatly appreciated.


keep on writting,


dna


* * * *


who are you?


Chatty


* * * *


How did I get on your list?????  What you say is true. I just want to know why you mailed this to me.


Sharre T


* * * *


again.. who are you?


Chatty


* * * *


thanks for the latest chapters...I always setting each new piece aside for a time when I can spend time reading and contemplating...so much more of that these days than in  the past ... another one of the gifts I have in my life today ... see you soon


Mary Flynn


* * * *

Hi Michael,


You might want to submit some of your poetry to an upcoming coillection of work by northstate artists, "Portfolio North."  Deadline will be Sept 15., watch for more info in the Free Press.


Greg (Redding Free Press)


* * * *

enjoying the chapters ... sometimes I open one up, I think that they are like opening a book to some random page ... and that the answer to my  most recent question will be waiting on that page for me. Sometimes it really works!

Hope you're having a fun summer ... I am!


Madeline Medeiros


* * * *


Claims to religious persecution are misbegotten paths to glory.

Countless peoples of every persuasion have suffered throughout history.

Many, perhaps most, have claimed themselves chosen by the divine.

The arrogance of collusion has always been an enticing delusion.


Nice closing line!


John King


* * * *


Please stop sending your poetry to this e-mail address. This is my work e-mail address and your poems simply clog the system.


Jaffe


* * * *


Michael …


please remove me from your poety list


i am having trouble keeping up with my email


good luck


Chatty


* * * *


Hi there,


Great writing, all good, all true,

Sure, keep it coming,

Keep me on your mysterious list

of interested parties

Love to keep reading your words,

feeling your passion,

find out how it all ends,

forever and ever,

OK?


RBirnberg


* * * *


Dear Michael Holtzhouzer


Thank you for your kind comments about my work. I think you will find more

each time you reread the works. Also available is The Shogun Scrolls and The Living Tao both published by Tuttle as well.


While on the subject of rereading, I think your paper is most intelligently put together and I will reread it. This section is quite right on, especially to me, as a writer. 


"Words, whatever the language, are conceptual icebergs each and every one of us envision differently. Thoughts of god, love, morality, money, tradition, politics, ad infinitum, inspire a myriad of responses, often conflicting because of rigid, dogmatic attachments to time. Yet, at the origin of all consciousness, that field from which this grand three-dimensional mirage has come to pass, is very much the same oneness, the same universal, timeless, eternal truth, despite our sophomoric arguments over the endless permutations of knowledge we ourselves have contrived."


Stay in touch and best regards.


Hanshi S. Kaufman


* * * *


I finally have had a chance to really read your work. Magnificent!!  Well said!!!  I shall pass it on to the very few who can really understand it.


Thanks for sharing ... pearlie girl


Shirly Einhorn


* * * *


Who is yaj_ekim@hotmail.com?


AWAYWWORDS


* * * *

Dear Michael,


I don't know how you got my e-mail address, but thanks for sending me  your thoughts on life and humanhood. I do recognize Kathleen's address.


Who are you?


Suzie Muchnick Spencer


* * * *


Please do not send this type of unsolicited e-mail again. If you persist I will contact hotmail and have your account shut down.


Clancy Priest

Chico Systems Administrator

* * * *


Dear Clancy,


Sorry to have bothered you. Some people enjoy what I'm sending, and  since you hadn't contacted me earlier, I would have assumed you were one  of them. No need to be so threatening. "Please take me off your mailing list" works quite well.


Take care,


Michael

* * * *


My apologies if I sounded rude, it is not my nature. I have users that  get so touchy about recieving this sort of e-mail. I thank you for your quick response. And again , sorry if I was rude.


Thanks,


Clancy Priest

Chico Systems Administrator


* * * * 


Hi Michael,


You sent me some rambling prose about the Stillnes Before Time. I skimmed the work and the writing was interesting. I'm a busy man and an email that long usually gets trashed, so before you send me another, I'd like to know who you are, how you chose me for your email list, and what your point is with this writing.


Think,


Mark Mavis


* * * *


It doesn't matter. You sent me some writing and it must've been a mistake.


AWAYWWORDS


* * * *


I don't know who you are. I don't know any Michaels. Well not any more. I'm not sure how you got my address. I haven't read any of the pieces you've sent. I'm also a writer and I do read for others but I need to know who they are.


Elizabeth (AWAYWWORDS)


* * * *


Illusion, more illusion.


yogi-doc


* * * *


Dear Michael,


Thanks for sending Chapter Two. Are you open to the exploring the possibility that there is something more to realize than "There is only the absolute And an infinity of appearances Disguising the way home"?  There is an even larger and far more scary reality to be awakened into than the absolute dimension of our existence. And many of your fellow realizers of the infinite are here doing this work with us in a white-hot cauldron of mutuality.


You're invited.


Love,


Ted Strauss


* * * *


Great stuff!


Peter Reck


* * * *


Yaj Ekim,


Thank you for your email. I will let you know when something new is available.

Right now I am working on six pieces that will shortly be published, including

a novel and a series of Zen Fairy Tales for Children of All Ages.


Incidentally, if you would like to be put on my mailing list you may forward

your snail address which is kept confidential. Due to the incredible amount of

email I am getting from around the world, I will be putting up a Homepage in

the very near future.


You are obviously fairly well enllightened as well, from what I am reading

that you are sending. Keep it up.


Hanshi S. Kaufman


* * * *


Dear Michael,


Victoria here from Steamboat Springs,  Thank you so much for your mail!  I love your postings and support your wonderful ability to write from your heart.


I'm off to teach at Kripalu for 3 weeks, I am assisting the DansKinetics teacher training program. I was in Estes Park last weekend and got to take classes from Nischala. She and Baskhar are as wonderful as ever and upon seeing her my heart nearly exploded from my chest and I began to sob. I don't think I have ever had anyone effect me the way she does, and I can feel that by merely being in her presence my heart expands and grows. What a miraculous thing!


Be well and happy!  We have had two snow storms so far, but leaves are still hanging on to the aspen and cottonwood trees.


Thanks again for sharing your great writings.


Namaste,


Victoria L. Strohmeyer


* * * *


Hello,


Is it possible to purchase through you a copy of REFLECTIONS OF A FELLOW SOJOURNER BY Michael J. Holshouser?  My E-mail address is litegraph@aol.com.


Thank you!


Sharon G. Amestoy


* * * *


Thank you for your E.Mails, but I am not interested in them. So please don´t include me in your mailing list.


Sincerely,


Rosemary Atri


* * * *


MERCI DE NE PLUS M ADRESSER DE COURRIER


Thirion


* * * *


Dear yaj_ekim,


Recieved 'Stillness'. We're all volunteers at non-profit JFL and up to our eyeballs, so it may take us some time to look at your manuscript and get back to you. Thanks for putting us on your addressee list.


We'd love to know how you found out about us. Hope you and yours have the best for the holidays


JFL staff


* * * *


Dear Michael,


I invite you to check out an essay I've posted on the web. I'd love to hear your reactions. To read it, go to www.sanielbonder.com and click on the Saniel & Other Adepts button. Then click on my photo - Ted - and you'll see a link to my essay titled Mutuality.


Ted Strauss


* * * *


Hello Michael


I have enjoyed reading your passages. One thing I noticed is that it takes me a while to get through them because I am forced to stop and ponder. You do have a very interesting view, though. I better be off. By the way, Shannon is in here (English lab) :)


Sara Godbold


* * * *


Hi Michael,


Thank you for sharing your"silliness" with me. It comes at a time when I am feeling rather "spiritually depleted."  I've printed "The Stillness" so I can reread them when I feel the need to reflect.


How "gifted " you are. I wish I could walk in your shoes for one day and feel such calmness. Perhaps as my year rushes to a close, I will begin to have the time to explore my inner self  with more respect .


Just finished up my last big show of the year , and it's time for a little blessed peace !


If you are in the area of Folsom, please call. It would be nice to see you out of the "show environment."


Thank you again for your insightful and inspiring thoughts. Many blessings for this season.


Your friend,


Marilu


* * * *


Hi there Michael,


I really do enjoy your reflections, they really match a lot of the ones I too, have made. Many merely call us selfish in our endeavors to be at one with ourselves because there is a whole world of others, however, you can not be true to anyone but yourself. You can see your reflections in other people and that may draw you to them, but it is you that you are trying desperately to love and understand. If you can become master,and lover of your own soul and give yourself the freedom to be exactly who you are in a world that may displace you, then you have accomplished something,and when the end comes you will walk with those who have always seen and known the truth.


Yet the need for some kind of companionship outside ourselves ebbs at our souls also. A bond of  separately connected energy forms surges and mingling amongst one another is divine. To feel the gentleness,strength, and love of someone elses soul is to feel the passion for mystery and ultimate emotion and awareness. I do hope the three of us shall mingle in mind and spirit and learn far more than we anticipated. Ultimately it is all about learning.


Hugs,


Eva Questo


* * * *


Michael,


Thank you so much, I will read and enjoy every word. 


See ya soon.


Wendy Coggins


* * * *


Hello.


I've enjoyed reading the poetry that you've sent, but I wonder ... who are you?! 


Deborah Gissing


* * * *


The Science of Kindness


"Those who attend will be taking a journey to the core. We will go past the fear of the future, and regrets of the past, into the heart of every moment."


"When you understand how to just be you, you can hear the sound of infinity. When you can nurture this state of consciousness, the quality of time shifts and prosperity can flow through you."


Thursday December 24th at 7 PM with Dr. Hari Simran Singh Khalsa yogi-doc


* * * *


Michael,


Thank you. I really enjoy your writing, I find you quite deep and intellectual. Let's get together and talk sometime, perhaps over coffee. 


Wendy Coggins


* * * *


Dear sir,


I am thoroughly enjoying you're beautiful writing, Stillness before time.


I have a yoga studio in Los Angeles, and have studied extensively with J. Krishnamurti as well as Jean Klien, U.G. and  other advaita, non-dualist guys and your writing is another shining jewel in this shining world. I'm wondering if I have perhaps missed a chapter, I think i inadvertently erased one, could you re e-Mail me chapters 1-9.


Thanks in advance,


Robert Birnberg

Community Yoga

Los Angeles


* * * *


MERCI D ARRETER DE M ENVAHIR DE MESSAGES


Thirion


* * * *


I have been

l   i   k   i   n   g  

(there's no good word)

your beautiful

writing.


Diana Lang


* * * *


The body is more than a dream. It is the gateway to higher awareness. Try reading this message without your body. Feel your feet on the ground and rejoice in the bald reality of being in a body.


amba stapleton


* * * *

Response:


Amba,


Higher awareness is just a dream, too. And I do enjoy this body, especially when it isn't achy.


Take care,


Michael


* * * *


Hi. I don't know who you are but I did enjoy your poem.


Thanks, Mark


* * * *


What is this?


Mack Mahon


* * * *


Hi again. I plan to look in the student book store for your book. Let me know if there's a better place to find it.


Mark  


p/s Have we met?


* * * *


Michael: ok, I'm interested and plan to get a copy. Keep me on your list.


Mark


* * * *


I find it rather amazing you're able to put into words some of the thoughts I believed nobody else ever had. Thanks for your sharing. By the way, I'm from Chico also, for the past 30 years at the U.


Mark


* * * *


Response:


Mark,


I think there are more of us than you might think. We are the mystics, the seers, the students, the thinkers, the witnesses of the human drama. We who discern the unity of all things, and yet must participate and endure the insanity of so many who do not, and probably never will. We pass each other every day, but most of us remain unseen because that is our way. Those whose fate it is to become known are really no different or better in my way of thinking. I suppose it's just the nature of the theater to place some on pedestals for history's sake.


About ten years ago, after 35 plus or minus years of drinking fully of this theater, I was sagging under the weight of world-weariness, and these aphoristic thoughts just started coming to mind. Because part of my experience was as a small town journalist, it was easy to carry a notebook and write them down. What you're getting is about 40 to 50 pages of over thirteen hundred thus far transcribed, with at least twenty more notebooks to go. And more still trickling into consciousness daily. Much of it is very repetitive, of course, and probably, I must admit, therapeutic. To what ends, if any, I know not, but it's been interesting to play it out as a scribe. We've all got to put in our time somehow.


Michael


P.S. Am not sure how I got your e-mail address, perhaps from a mutual friend or randomly from forwarded material. The way this whole thing has unfolded has been quite a haphazard process.


* * * *


Michael,


Thanks for your reply. My theater has not often been the written word but the

classroom, along with some face to face counseling. My field is social work and I've been employed in some capacity in over 10 different agencies. This is my last semester at CSUC and I'm not sure what's next. I like your thought that there are many others who do think enough to care. I find the lack of concern for what's happening in the world and the apathy toward others discouraging, and so I keep struggling with the question of why and what's it all about. About 10 years ago I began the long process to find some answers through meditation. My only regret is that I didn't start much earlier. I'm still looking for the answers, but I think my questions are getting better. My fear is that maybe there are no answers. Anyway its comforting to know others wonder too.


Mark


* * * *


Mark,


Somewhere along the line I reached a point where either I didn't have any more questions, or I didn't need any more answers. Am not sure why, or whether it's a good thing, but these days I just take what comes the best I can.


Once upon a time, I was a lightweight activist/idealist, but anymore the whole mess is just too boggling for any manmade remedy. I'm kind of waiting for mother nature to bring some order back to things.


As for when you started meditating, at least you started. Out of six plus or minus billion, probably only a sliver ever get around to really examining things. Count yourself lucky (or unlucky) to be one of them.


Take care.


Michael


* * * *


Dear Michael,


Thank you for your emails. Your words ring true for All of humanity. How did you get my email address?  I am also living in Chico, California. Please check out my web site: www.angelfire.com/hi/samaadhi. Talk with you again, hopefully.


Samadhi


* * * *

Have enjoyed reading your work ...


Thanks, Herb


* * * *

Dear Michael,


I have lost Stillness Before Time chapter 1 to 13 can you resend them? I am enjoying them very much.


Thanks.


Simon Marrocco


* * * *


Hi Michael,


Yes, I now remember you, and your poetry is superb!  Thank you for writing. Please check out my web site: www.angelfire.com/hi/samaadhi. Also, go to spiritweb.org, scroll down to chat rooms, and register in, then go to either MtShasta (my hangout) or Stonehedge. You will find me there as "Samadhi."


Bye for now …


Samadhi


* * * *


Dear Michael,


Lovely poetry ... thank you for sending it ... 


Samadhi


* * * *


Hi Michael,


I love receiving your thoughts.

Are they published in book form?

I'd like to buy it so I can read it in 3-D with my hands on paper.

You know what I mean?

You are doing such a good work.


Appreciatively,


Diana Lang